April 25, 2007

Lucky Luc

From Mandira Bedi's column "Field Talk", Hindustan Times Cafe, April 25:
    Do you know the most interesting part of a World Cup semifinal involving Australia? ... [Y]ou tend to be extremely predictable of an Aussie win. ... I think there is [another] factor also. It is the occurrence of the unpredictable. I am tremendously inclined to give full points to Ricky Ponting and his boys even before the start of [the game].

    ...

    The only time [Australia] was down this season was when it lost a tri-series final to England and slumped to a 0-3 humiliation against New Zealand. But thereafter, Ponting and his boys have been on a galloping march. First, they picked up the Champions Trophy ... followed by the 5-0 Ashes whitewash at home over England. [Italics mine]
Hmm. You are "predictable" of an Aussie win; then you "acknowledge the occurrence of the unpredictable", which makes you "tremendously inclined" to an Aussie win. All I can say is, again, hmm.

And consider some dates: Champions Trophy, Oct/Nov 2006. Ashes whitewash, Nov 2006 to Jan 2007. Tri-series and final, Jan/Feb 2007. 0-3 defeat by NZ, Feb 2007.

Therefore, I am at a loss to understand that "thereafter". (Then again...).

***

Quoted in full and verbatim, here's a feature titled "What's on Your Mind Today?" in HT Cafe, April 25.
    It's not exactly an obsessive, compulsive disorder, but here are a few things that are top-of-mind ..

    TAKEFIVE

  • ZIPPERS: Now stop looking at the fly of your jeans. This is one thing, you really need to be careful about.

  • FRIENDS: Sounds a little uncool but it's true. For some, friends with looks, intelligence and contacts are a passport to being in the the [sic] limelight. Tch, tch.

  • NAMES: There's no dearth of people who dislike their names. But hey, remember Shakespeare? What's in a Gogol, yaar.

  • LINGERIE: There are plenty who have lingerie for all occasions. Need we tell you why?

  • HANDS: For some reasons still being researched, people are conscious about their hands when they aren't busy. Forget the manicurist, huh.
OK, I'll admit it. I have no idea, repeat no idea, what this is all about. Any help welcome.

Also, to that question "Need we tell you why?", my answer is "Yes. Please."

***

Lady called Kim Sharma answers reader's queries in a column in HT Cafe titled "AgniAunt". In the column in the April 23 issue, she answers four questions.

Her first answer ends: "Lov n luc."

Her second answer ends: "Right now, my lov ... Luc."

Her third answer ends: "Luv n luc."

Her fourth answer ends: "Luv."

Which, of course, leaves me wondering: just who is this guy "Luc"?

***

Successive questions posed to Sexologist Dr Kavan Lakdawala, in his column "Sex and the City" (HT Cafe, April 24):
  • While washing my penis during bathing, I ejaculate quite often. I am worried that the sperm left in the bathroom may lead to the ladies of the family getting pregnant. Is that possible?

  • I went to a massage parlour a few days ago. The girl who was massaging me stroked my penis and I ejaculated. She was fully clothed and I didn't touch her. What are the chances of getting HIV infection?
I don't know. I think Dr Lakdawala should have reassured the second questioner with something like: "Don't worry, dude! She was fully clothed, right? She won't get any infection!"

5 comments:

AJAY said...

Hi,
The god only knows who will link to the world cup, its unthinkable that who will win the world cup. South African player are also dangerous on their side. Auss. shound not forget the the day when south africa were having a win over Austrlia .

km said...

Someone please cancel Dilip's newspaper subscriptions :D

Baby Vaijayanti and Puppy Manohar said...

Dear Dilip,

I am reading your post at work and I burst out laughing and I cant stop. What should I do?

love and luck
Suzan (Br.)
"See \"\" (gestures) inverted commas" - Dr. Zakir Naik

Dilip D'Souza said...

BabyVaPM: my suggestion is to go take a bath while fully clothed.

Gud loc.

km: been there done that. Get your Tootsie Wootsie icecream.

Red Soul said...

=)) I dont believe the questions published in "sex and the city". Also, it was VERY cheap and showed the lack of creativity when they named the coloum that.